Voice & Action of a Strong woman

BEYOND THE BALLOT - Women's Rights

Strongly recommend this online 3 weeks course looking at Beyond the Ballot: Women's Rights and Suffrage from 1866 to today.  This afternoon was very pleasant one and an inspiring one completing the first week.. During this week we have been introduced to some incredibly strong willed and determined women to put right fairness where there was unfairness and pain for women.

One woman from this week as really touched my heart and although I felt a kindred spirit in all the women talked about this one woman I am impressed with.
Caroline Norton as been more of pioneer for reform that ever I had known about.  I am saddened she has not been the key figure in history lessons for me till today.  She was a victim of a violent abuser but fought for reforms on three key aspects that of divorce, child custody and property rights.  Dr Stella Moss discussed her case on the course as a major Social reformer and was a colourful character with many aspects to her whole being.  I have on google and searching more about Caroline found poetry that she used to express herself and she was a keen writer.

Caroline Norton was born in 1808. She was the daughter of Thomas Sheridan and the novelist Caroline Henrietta Callander. In 1827, Caroline married George Chapple Norton, a Barrister and MP for Guildford.
 Caroline was subjected to mental and physical abuse and in 1836 the couple separated. Caroline was able to live off her earnings as a writer. However, George claimed these earnings as his property, taking Caroline to court and winning the case.
 However, Caroline used the ruling to her advantage by running-up bills in her husband’s name. When the creditors came to collect the debts, she told them that they could sue her husband.
 Caroline was instrumental in raising the profile of issues surrounding custody of children, divorce and women’s rights to property (or lack thereof upon marriage). Her efforts were a significant contributory factor in a series of reforms in the nineteenth century. 

 For all her hard work and significant wins on reform we are still struggling now in 2018 with the need for better financial support on our healing journey from these violent perpetrators.... Clearly our perpetrators financially cripple their victims seeing this as one of a weak areas to prey on. But this lady today as got me digging deeper into the property laws as you know I have been cheated out of property with a past perpetrator so this is going to be an interesting search for me.  We need to look at this especially when the perpetrators have coerced their prey in an out of court settlement... we really need to have a complete look at the financial abuse and how to get the survivor back on the track to rebuilding their lives with financial dignity.... 

I am writing this having been sanctioned by the jobcentre for lack of evidence of job searching yet have completed a TEFL course and been doing a mandatory foundation course and modules for the British Red Cross.... I have no funds coming in now and am scratching around for food... today thus far had one cup of milky coffee toast tomato soup and herbal tea with drinks of tap water too.... I do not think this is a fair way of treating a survivor.... I do apply for work but now over 60 yrs do not get even short listed... the most sensible solution would be to have my state pension.... 

Every Thursday the WASPI women are protesting outside parliament meeting opposite Emily Pankhurst statue......Weekly Protest for WASPI women  This last Thursday I saw Boris's brother pass by and called for him to listen to me Jo Johnson did stop and he did listen to all the situation... He is glad I have John McDonnell, Shadow Chancellor helping me as my MP but my eldest daughter is in Boris's constituency so he suggested she make an appointment with his brother Boris Johnson MP for Uxbridge and South Ruislip and Foreign Secretary..  I know his predecessor John Randall would listen and would be upset at the behaviour of Amine towards me after all our immigration efforts. I also have left a voicemail for the Prime Minister on the matter too... IT IS SERIOUS WOMEN DESERVE BETTER SUPPORT ON THEIR PATHWAY OF HEALING....

I am sure Caroline would be with me on this matter for sure.  

Caroline Elizabeth Sarah Norton, born in London in 1808, is the author of The Lady of la Garaye (Macmillan, 1866), The Sorrows of Rosalie: A Tale with Other Poems (John Ebors and Co., 1829), and several other poetry collections. She is also known for her political influence and involvement in women’s rights.

 Here is the first verse of her poems - I do not love thee 

I do not love thee!—no! I do not love thee!
And yet when thou art absent I am sad;
   And envy even the bright blue sky above thee,
Whose quiet stars may see thee and be glad.
I highlight this - why was she sad when he was absent... and it is that actually many of us feel we are in love with our perpetrators but it is delusional and part of their illusion that they create.. and you can grieve for them when they are gone or you have left and got out.... but what you grieve for is the illusion that they created that hooked you into the love and relationship and for many keeps them fixed. 

So here we are in 2018 another generation of women and another generation of perpetrators.... and still needing reform to help women heal and rebuild.... when will we get this right and fair for women? Sign the petition it is still on the go till I get some debate for reform. 

Petition for Strong & Stable Pathway of Support for Survivors 

Roses are Red Violence is blue

Roses are Red and Violence is Blue - Becareful of your Valentine.... One of the observations I have made in the Womens's group I attend is that we are all caring, loving and compassionate people.  Our hearts were open to our men.  The door to our hearts was open and we became victims of criminal predators.  Predators that used that open door to manipulate and controls us....

This is not to say we must become hard and keep that door closed and lose our very being.  But our being has become abused and battered, all aspects of us mind, body and spirit have been attacked by a callous manipulator.  He is like a cat with a mouse playing and toying with us..using our love to keep us fixed until his goal is achieved, like a mouse we can be destroyed with his vileness or we can get away but it takes time to nurse our injuries to survive and be able to rebuild our lives.  

Why stay? you ask.... Here is a link to a TED talk on Crazy Love, Leslie Morgan Steiner, helps you understand.. Crazy Love

Future relationships with a new partner may be ruined if we take the toxicity of the vile past into this relationship.  It takes a good kind, true caring man to understand you for you to dare to enter into a new love.  

In among this is the financial controlling and crippling that the perpetrator has done to your life. You need some help financially to heal and rebuild.  

If you do find another man to love you, he has to take on that you are emotionally vulnerable and that you financially crippled too.... 

There is need to change the DWP policies to help women to have a strong and stable financial pathway of support to heal and rebuild.... She really does need some help to get back her financial freedom and be strong to re-enter the job market.  Strong she must be to re-enter the job market as there are bullies in the workplace and she has been living with a bully. She must be able to cope.  When fully healed and supported she can be a strong cookie of a woman for any team to employ. 

But if she is an older woman like many of the long term survivors are we need our state pension to help too.  I, like many of the old women that have been abused and used are finding that even though we could take on some work hours there is no offer of paid work.  There is endless volunteer work offered.  I personally had an issue at the jobcentre when I signed on for the JSA I was told that voluntary work is not acceptable... and when I challenged this I was told I was intimidating the staff..... for me now the logical solution would be State Pension to help me as I have paid in since my first job in 1969. But I am a 1950s born woman and a WASPI that cannot get her state pension till 2020.. i honesty I do not think I can survive to this. 

I want you my readers to help champion my call for the DWP here in the UK to recognise the need to give more financial support to women survivors.... we are not asking for something for nothing - we really do need this help to help cut the ties to the past.  Our criminals seem to get away with all and we are left with the devastation on our lives.

No Finances keeps us tethered to the past. We cannot move on and heal.... we cannot move on and rebuild our lives.

I am weakening in the poverty I am now pushed into.  I cannot just run into another paid post.  My career is over and I am getting older, my body carries the scars of the past and I have surgical and medical history - in this arthritis is developing.  Poor diet from poverty not helping my overall well-being. I would like some paid work maybe teaching or giving paid talks... I have a project helping refugees as we are all traumatised souls, that lost all to perpetrators and trying to rebuild our lives.... Though many admire what I am doing there is no financial help for me and them.

I TRY DEAR READERS.... please can someone help me champion the cause and no matter what happens to me - you keep on fighting for what I was trying to achieve... That women are helped to regain their financial dignity. 

Do you know I am in such a financial crisis that when I do pass from this world I  have no life cover for my funeral costs... My broken body will have to be disposed of through the 1987 public health act.

Broken body Broken life because my heart was an open door for not one but two criminal perpetrator husbands that used and abused me...They escaped justice and that is another battle we must take up on that CPS are letting them go and we in our crazy love protect them from being held to account.   Vincent and Amine will one day be brought to account I am sure by a greater power than us all. 

Happy Valentine's Day - Becareful cupid's arrow may be a fist!

Help challenge the DWP sign the petition and share many thanks
Strong and Stable Pathway of Support for Women Survivors

Deeds not Words at last

Good John my MP of over 20 yrs and his PA are in dialogue with me... We have an issue in that I am a WASPI as you know from my blogposts I cannot get my state pension as born in 1954 - I am 63 about to be 64yrs and having to sign on for JSA.... I am applying for work and busy with online courses and projects - I have offers of voluntary work but not paid work... Yesterday in the Jobcentre different members of staff saw me and I had no evidence of applying for work yet had evidence of my attendance on a foundation course for an NGO that helps refugees in London.    I can work one day a week as a volunteer in one of their centres.... The Jobcentre staff sanctioned me as this is not recognised and I challenged them and was labelled intimidating and too political.... So went to see John and now we are in dialogue again since our natter around his kitchen table some months ago...... We need a complete review of the DWP with its badly thought out policies.  Apparently volunteer work is not recognised...... yet I feel that anyone claiming benefits that are volunteering should be given extra for the energy and effort this takes... and it is contributing to society and local communities... It is also plugging the gaps in the system where charities are having to pick up the pieces of badly written policies in society and services.. 

Anyway the crux of the issue with my poverty at this time is that I have been financially crippled by perpetrators ... so we really do need to challenge this point and get a strong and stable pathway of support for women survivors to heal, detox and rebuild their lives......

I have been signposted to try to get some help from this charity Zacchaeus 200 Trust Z2K fighting poverty through justice... Z2K Fighting Poverty  

..and in this day of all remembering the Suffragettes and votes for women... Lets hope that Mrs May yields as she recognises all the votes she could lose from the WASPI women and their families and from women survivors that are having a bad time not being helped on their pathway of healing and rebuilding their lives.