This is not to say we must become hard and keep that door closed and lose our very being. But our being has become abused and battered, all aspects of us mind, body and spirit have been attacked by a callous manipulator. He is like a cat with a mouse playing and toying with us..using our love to keep us fixed until his goal is achieved, like a mouse we can be destroyed with his vileness or we can get away but it takes time to nurse our injuries to survive and be able to rebuild our lives.
Why stay? you ask.... Here is a link to a TED talk on Crazy Love, Leslie Morgan Steiner, helps you understand.. Crazy Love
Future relationships with a new partner may be ruined if we take the toxicity of the vile past into this relationship. It takes a good kind, true caring man to understand you for you to dare to enter into a new love.
In among this is the financial controlling and crippling that the perpetrator has done to your life. You need some help financially to heal and rebuild.
If you do find another man to love you, he has to take on that you are emotionally vulnerable and that you financially crippled too....
There is need to change the DWP policies to help women to have a strong and stable financial pathway of support to heal and rebuild.... She really does need some help to get back her financial freedom and be strong to re-enter the job market. Strong she must be to re-enter the job market as there are bullies in the workplace and she has been living with a bully. She must be able to cope. When fully healed and supported she can be a strong cookie of a woman for any team to employ.
But if she is an older woman like many of the long term survivors are we need our state pension to help too. I, like many of the old women that have been abused and used are finding that even though we could take on some work hours there is no offer of paid work. There is endless volunteer work offered. I personally had an issue at the jobcentre when I signed on for the JSA I was told that voluntary work is not acceptable... and when I challenged this I was told I was intimidating the staff..... for me now the logical solution would be State Pension to help me as I have paid in since my first job in 1969. But I am a 1950s born woman and a WASPI that cannot get her state pension till 2020.. i honesty I do not think I can survive to this.
I want you my readers to help champion my call for the DWP here in the UK to recognise the need to give more financial support to women survivors.... we are not asking for something for nothing - we really do need this help to help cut the ties to the past. Our criminals seem to get away with all and we are left with the devastation on our lives.
No Finances keeps us tethered to the past. We cannot move on and heal.... we cannot move on and rebuild our lives.
I am weakening in the poverty I am now pushed into. I cannot just run into another paid post. My career is over and I am getting older, my body carries the scars of the past and I have surgical and medical history - in this arthritis is developing. Poor diet from poverty not helping my overall well-being. I would like some paid work maybe teaching or giving paid talks... I have a project helping refugees as we are all traumatised souls, that lost all to perpetrators and trying to rebuild our lives.... Though many admire what I am doing there is no financial help for me and them.
I TRY DEAR READERS.... please can someone help me champion the cause and no matter what happens to me - you keep on fighting for what I was trying to achieve... That women are helped to regain their financial dignity.
Do you know I am in such a financial crisis that when I do pass from this world I have no life cover for my funeral costs... My broken body will have to be disposed of through the 1987 public health act.
Broken body Broken life because my heart was an open door for not one but two criminal perpetrator husbands that used and abused me...They escaped justice and that is another battle we must take up on that CPS are letting them go and we in our crazy love protect them from being held to account. Vincent and Amine will one day be brought to account I am sure by a greater power than us all.
Happy Valentine's Day - Becareful cupid's arrow may be a fist!
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Strong and Stable Pathway of Support for Women Survivors
