After a lovely meeting on Monday I came home to an interesting development on facebook there was a message from a woman that I thought was asking for details for the weekend Empowerment but it was one of the members of the local council. She states she is an advocate for women that have undergone DV but was quite brusque on the open wall. Sometimes folk in work posts for a long time can feel threatened if there are new innovative ideas out on the scene. Rather than embracing the innovation and finding out more, they wish to destroy the perceived threat. There is a very important point about the open dialogue that was on the wall despite me reminding her that the wall is open to all the international friends... and of course many around the world saw what was happening. I have kept screen captures and file of the dialogue. But bless her instead of arranging a meeting to look at the plans for healing and Empowering women weekend she chose to challenge in full view of some friends of mine. She did realise eventually that she was in full view posting and did delete the dialogue -but it is on file. It is useful for analysis that there is a continued mistake in the system in that when you talk of DV folk always thinks of the time of the attacks and violence. But there is more to it than this ... it is the long journey of healing and restoring confidence and love of self and restoring self worth. Detoxing from the ugliness of violence upon oneself. It is recalibrating life and rebuilding to reconnect with the self you feel you have lost and expand on self that was squashed and beaten down by the perpetrator...It is about restoring inner peace in the new life... The way this woman approached me was abrasive and invasive. She challenged my right and my qualification to put on such an event. Despite me being a graduate nurse and midwife of 38yrs within top teaching hospitals, she was still forging on in her attack of the whole event. But even qualifications are not necessary, women can be proactive to serve their needs among themselves and build such a weekend together. There is no doubt she has been doing work over the 23yrs in the borough and put together a one stop advice and panic button webpage but when you are in the throes of it all you cannot think straight to look for this... However the weekend was not for the acute phase of the journey but for those further down the line of the journey from 5yrs to 20yrs of recovery. But she has gone to all the trouble to sabotage the weekend plans without discussion face to face with me, she rang the DVIP & the university and now got the whole thing cancelled by her not me or those that need it... Rather similar to controllers... Now I have had women coming to me to say who is she? we have never had any help from her? We have to draw attention to the fact that if she is an advocate on the council why is she allowing the council to harass and threaten eviction of women victims in the borough?
Women have the right to decide for themselves as to what they need to help them! No one has ownership to our lives! That is why we got out of controlling relationships!! Hence the need to empower!
Anyway bas! enough of this as there have been some wonderful meetings this week for me. I am impressed by the young woman that does work for an international woman's charity. She has a company that would be interested in helping pick up the pieces so women can still have the healing and empowerment. Wonderful meeting with some dynamic business people that immediately listened and saw a great opportunity to help women rebuild their lives. Their concern and kindness palpable to help.
Today had a meeting in London. So wonderful to have time with our Parliamentary staff and security police. They always take an interest in my activist work both domestic and international. Will be able to drop of letters to ministers next week to highlight the issues to be addressed for a better pathway of support! But spotted the Votes for Women products... Felt inspired yes the message to keep going, as the women did to win the right to vote. Their voices were heard and they won.
All we are asking for is care compassion by the system to permit us to have our dignity back, our financial dignity and have a strong and stable pathway of healing and empowerment to be the women we are...and rebuild our lives to be able to move on away from the constant tethers of failing systems upon us and those that think they know what is or not best for us!!! WE are wonderful brave women that have cheated death so many times with the attacks upon our being. We do not deserve a system or a local council that continues to batter us with drops in support, threatens us with bailiffs and evictions for council tax or rent or any support services... We we do not need an advocate that snoops and is brusque is challenging and sabotaging to our fundamental right to healing and empowerment. So grateful to the friends that support me and keep me strong. InshAllah we will win and move on to new pastures to rebuild. But thank you to the lady for sharing her rather interesting approach to the issue it was enlightening to all that witnessed it. It makes for a continued need for a complete review of understanding and needs...Most certainly the review of the DWP policies that are failing so many with drops in support for those in need of some help. We also need a review of the State Pension for those women that are now over 60yrs and survivors of DV. Thank you for those that are seeing the whole story and understanding to sign the petition.
إن شاء الله يعمل في نهاية المطاف!
